I think that the point is that people suffer, because life is, basically, painful; some suffer more than others, and one person's suffering can never be compared with other people's suffering. Nor does it have any inherent value. If my T started talking about "things happening for a reason" I would respectfully ask him to have his head examined.

But if I suffer, I can try to turn it into something meaningful - try to get more empathy for others, rather than try to make others suffer as well, for instance. That doesn't happen automatically and again it doesn't mean that my suffering has a reason. I look at it more in terms of having to use the cards I've been dealt, rather than trying to exchange my hand, or resenting others for getting all the kings and aces. It's not easy. And I certainly don't think that suffering is a prerequisite for being able to empathise with others.