Hi Matt. I am so sorry to read your post and to know that you are experiencing this in your life. I too have treatment-resistant OCD. It has been a living hell at times, for stretches so long that this last time around it has changed me and 97% of the time I believe that this is as good as it's going to get for me anymore, and spend most of my time trying to create ways to protect myself for the duration of my life when things 'get bad' again. (It comes and goes for me, but when it comes, it stays for a long time.) I hope you find a way.