Thank you so much for replying; your post helped me a lot! It's so good to know that I'm not the only one, and a few of the things you described I experience as well. And don't you know, I was just randomly IMing some people with interesting profiles at AOL, and I met this really nice girl there who also has some troubles with socializing and depression. I think we're gonna be good friends; when I was talking to her I felt more happy than I have in weeks! It's always a lot easier for me to make online friends, and once I meet the right person, I'm talkative and we even get down to some important (and secret) emotional stuff as well. I could never do that with a "real" person, except if we had had good talks on the IM or through emails before.
I also thought some more, and I decided that a lot of the time I only want to go out to meet people's expectations, because they think it's "normal" that young people should go out and have fun. I have fun with myself when I'm at home reading or playing around with my computer, and I'm not even lonely when I have online friends to talk to. People just don't understand, and my mom always pressures me about going out, sometimes to the point that I lie and say that I've done this or that, so as not to disappoint her, or make her worry. Sometimes I go to the movies by myself, and I really don't mind so much, only I feel really self-conscious about people at the theater because I think about what they think that I show up there all alone. I always have the problem that I want people to think well of me and like me, strangers or not, which is why I had some bad experiences with "friends" who just used me in the past.
But I realize that this post is getting way too long! If anyone wants to talk outside of this forum, by email, AIM or MSN messenger, you can email me or send me a Private Message! Thanks!