Hi Whoami, there's a chance that you're explaining it just fine, it's just that some people just don't "get it". So not you, but them. Depending on the people though you could try to make them "get it" (or "get it" just a little bit more?).
For instance don't except the:
"Quit feeling sorry for yourself" or "Your life doesn't sound so bad to me" or "Why don't you stop being a baby and DO something about it"
Tell them how disrespectful those sorts of comments are and tell them a bit more about how it is for you.
I know comments like that can make you feel so disheartened..........especially after you've tried to explain something so personal, and you might want to just give up on them but if you feel that you can just let them know how wrong those comments are.
They still may not truely understand but at least they may get a little closer.
And I'd say that talking about how you're feeling/depression shouldn't be seen by anyone as whiney, it is what it is, the feelings are very real, and you're not choosing to feel that way, you do feel that way.
And....anyway........at least you do know that there are people on here who are going to understand how you feel if you're struggling for support out there. We're here for you!!
Alison