First - let me say congrats on surviving that emotion. I know that wave can seem taller than a mountain.

You found something that "worked" for you (avoidance). It really isn't a lot different than finding something that works for you - called self harm.

Your shrink probably will like the fact you didn't harm yourself (so do the rest of us). But your shrink will probably not like the avoidance...

I say - you dealt with your issue the best that you could have today.... Probably not the best thing to resort to. But it sure could have been worse. Congrats to you. Maybe next time can be even better.....