Quote:
Originally Posted by ToeJam
I sure can relate to a lot of that... have picked up on similarities in what we say and feel on these boards.
RE: Your boyfriend, credit where it is due... he has stuck with you irrespective of this and that says a lot regarding both strength of character and his commitment to you.
Personally I've found that since I've started being totally honest with my wife... rather than trying to mask it, keep a brave face on (and the major slips that happened with that when the pressure cooker just started to blow), it has made things easier and in some ways has been reassuring for her... to know that I'm getting help and as well... am trying to help myself.
So, in that regards, just try to let it flow... if he wants to talk, to understand, to want to help... give him some rope to work with.
As for the worry of leaving the house... again be honest... if you need him, let him know... if you feel you will manage, then reassure him with that as well.
As for the break from destructive thoughts... and the thinking about it bring it back on... are there grounding activities for you to do? Or something you enjoy that will distract you again?
Sorry... really tired right now and about to go bed, so not my best reply but I hope it helps and just wanted to add I'm thinking of you.
Have a good sleep eventually night owl and yeah  |
It's hard being open because I've tried to keep it to myself all these years but I know it doesn't do me or him any favours by me keeping quiet. It's just a hard habit to break! I do try but I am pretty lousy at being honest!
He works nights too which is part of the problem. Four nights a week I'm home alone which is when it all goes wrong. I generally just tell him I'll be fine...even though I'm not sure I will be because he has to go to work. I can't ask him to stay home every night with me and not get paid, it just wouldn't work!
You know, I have no clue when it comes to grounding exercises. Keep hearing this term being thrown around but I don't know what it is, what it involves, nothing really. Maybe someone could explain this to me?
I will try not to stay up too late...!
I had rubbish sleep last night so I am kind of tired, just hope I sleep when I do try.