It sounds like you are not alone in many of these troubles. If family already knows you have other responsibilities, they are not putting pressure on you to be there. They are releasing you of any extra stressors from what they are certain you already carry from present and past stresses. Your husband is working hard and suffering from the tiring labour of his job as well as managing problems at home, such as gathering the chickens together, maintaining the home and a bad back. Do not feel that you are alone. Everybody is stressing. Perhaps communicating your worries to loved ones can help unite everyone as a team who can help each other make it through the tough times. E.g. "I will help you with this chore, if you can help me with this chore. When you need that or I need this, we can help each other."