Im sooooooo stupid

I just watched Real Life on MTV it was I Self Injure

i have become quite addicted to surrounding myself with SI info, pictures online, and this was just another thing but it wasa too graphic...and my boyfriend came home and yelled at me...

so after everything i was anxious and .....i did it...i was like a rabid animal looking for my blade...
why did my boyfriend have to be angry with me ...