Yikes! I assumed the pros and cons had been discussed many, many times because the scenario you just described was unimaginable to me. I question the therapist's competency and fear for the well being and safety of the people in his/her care. The therapist has put you in the position of needing a therapist to get past this horrendous incident and to review every assessment made for accuracy before creating a correct course of treatment. Many people begin therapy to help them decide whether or not to make a major life change and to have professional support in dealing with the decision. My therapist didn't tell me to get a divorce. He said married or divorced I needed to learn how to manage the family dynamics because we had young children. Eventually we did divorce and the same therapist helped me control my anxiety and manage the triggers that would have made for a messy divorce. I would not be surprised to learn that this therapist is well known to the ethics board. You sound like a strong person who is determined to do what is best for her family. It doesn't sounds like you are going to let this terrible experience deter you from getting the help needed. I wish you the best of luck and every possible happiness.