My T will not hug me if I don't ask.

He knows I have abuse history and sometimes by end of session I am just too overwhelmed. He always lets me ask and gives great appropriate hugs.. Sometimes I just hug his upper arm... He always lets me know that he's there for me. The ONLY time he will initiate touch is if I'm badly dissociated and he has asked me in advance if it was okay to just touch my knee or arm. Sometimes I know I shudder at the touch even when "away." I HAVE to know I am safe at all times there whether I'm really there or not.

I think it was highly inappropriate. Especially in the form of a command.
And in light of his erotic feelings for her made it even more so...

Sorry, but there are boundaries for a reason...protects us and them and keeps the feelings of trust and safety and authenticity in tact.

With all due respect, I feel that this forum is for people looking for advice from their peers and people we know we can trust and are going through the same situations. People that we know will trust our confidentiality....it's also in the forum rules...
If you have such questions, shouldn't they be addressed to your professors or advisors with professional and educational expertise?

Respectfully,
WB