possibly even self-sabotaging some of my chances to keep my job, for which I am interviewing next week.

And I am so ashamed at my immature and untimely actions, I don't even want to go through what I did here, as if it is such a great shameful thing.

I wish I could be a nice person. A person who doesn't interpret situations defensively, as I did today; who is generous of spirit and easygoing.

And as Sonny and Cher sang in the Sixties -- it ain't me, babe.