You don't deserve to feel like this, and asking and finding help can be the hardest thing. I have been really frustrated with the idea that employers can't let people go for medical or mental health related issues. I had a kidney stone and a week before my surgery I was let go. They simply said I wasn't getting along with a co-worker. Unfortunately, even if they let you go for a clearly illegal reason it's then up to you to contact an employment lawyer or you're state office which deals with such issues. This means a legal battle or at least lots of red tape to wade through. I'm now struggling with the unemployment process and my depression. I'm not trying to depress you even more, but I want to share my experience. I should have left my job, but hindsight is always 20-20. Your mental health is worth more than any job could possibly be. However, I stayed because some, if not all, of my co-workers were supportive and I didn't want to lose that support system. Keep your chin up as best you can. There are huge social hurdles to getting help for any kind of mental illness and I hope that someday society finds some way to protect workers and not just the people with all the money. Please know you're not alone.