i dont know why i surrounded myself with that stuff

i know why...because thats how i cope...by cutting...and if i couldnt do it id watch others do it...its like when your on a diet...you dont eat alot but watch others shoving fatty food down their throats...whyll you sit there with your carrot....

its all gone overboard again...it hurts to put clothes on!!!! All over my stomach my abdomine and my legs....of course all the places where clothes with rub against your skin but its either that or my arms...and Dear Lord with all of these feelings I dont need people asking me like little parrots...whats that...where did you get that....how about that...grrrrrrrr
if i keep doing this and cutting this bad...i either wont be allowed to wear clothes or ill stop bleeding like last time...then what...im tired..and im going back to work tonight...havent been there in awhile and the thought is driving me nuts..i really dont want to go....