Is this something that was kept "hush-hush" in your family, your household growing up? I know with me, my father was a brute, but we had to present the image of "the perfect family" to the world. And, it was weird a little at first when I started to "tell people" what my life was like growing up. But, it rapidly became very much a cathartic thing with me, and I got over that fear rapidly - to the point I'm sure I made some people uncomfortable by "telling all". I think you definitely should try to talk about it with your best friend. She should be "safe" for you, understanding and concerned. Because, keeping it bottled up is no good.