I wish it were as easy as "forcing myself"... I woulda forced myself to be better already. Seriously. I did manage to go on the bus Saturday... the driver just about put us off 6 miles from home because I was having full blown panic attack right there in my seat with my BF there holding my hand and telling me everything was going to be ok. If he hadn't have been there, I woulda been put out in a part of town where I had no idea where I was and there would have been nothing that I could do about it but cry. I came home and slept for 16 hours straight after being out of the house for less than 2.