Thing is, I'm not personally proud of this though. Hence the question mark I added with this post. It's not something I don't think I'm into, I feel really guilty of the entire thing and for what I do. I feel like I left myself down after all the progress I made. I want to stop. I feel like an idiot.

I agree with the honesty and mutual respect. I've been nothing but a good partner to whoever I date, but as soon as things turned sour, that sort of thing happened.