I agree that good friends are important. Problem was I befriended anyone because I craved the feelings of belonging and acceptance. I suppose that might help since your body releases endorphins (feel good chemicals) when you exercise.

Update: My mother literally made me hate my paternal relatives for many years because I felt that they've rejected me. I feel extremely guilty for feeling that way when I was younger because I learned that they loved me and cared for me; I also learned that they're good people--my great grandmother became ill, so my grandma (my primary caretaker at the time) sent me "home" to live with my parents because she wasn't able to take care of both her mother and myself. She would mostly mention specific relatives (one of my aunts, my great grandmother, my grandpa); she didn't mention my grandma, two of my other aunts, and my uncles. She couldn't make me hate my grandmother. I know she's insecure, didn't initially want children, and wants to boost her self esteem but that doesn't give her the right to tell me lies, make me feel inferior, and manipulate me to make me behave, neglect my needs or hate my paternal relatives. I've lived a sheltered life for all the years that I've been alive...so she was one of my primary sources of information. I did not know any better and my brain wasn't fully developed, so I didn't question her words. I lived in fear during those years until the age of 17 when I finally felt like I've had enough and decided to speak up. She got my "love" for a short time when I failed to see the truth. My mother wanted me to stop complaining and wanting to live with my paternal relatives, so she would tell me throughout the years that they didn't want me to live with them. She eventually stopped when I denied the fact that I wanted to live with them. Deep down, I was hurting and I denied it at first because I didn't want to feel unwanted. I felt helpless so I eventually stopped wishing that I was still living with my paternal relatives. At that point, I felt hopeless. I still feel that people would judge and reject me, so I encounter difficulty with speaking up. She made me think and feel like I was a "bad" child until I read articles pertaining to psychology and parenting and questioned my behavior. I wanted to find out why I acted the way I did and why other children wreck havoc (when they're young) as well. I have a difficult time trusting people because I've been deceived. I've had a difficult time forgiving her until I discovered that I should forgive her for my own sake (inner peace), so that I don't feel any worse.

I've felt inferior almost all my life which doesn't feel good. Ever since, I've felt inferior, I longed for acceptance and belonging somewhere...which has many consequences. I'd befriend anyone because that's how desperate I was. When I hit puberty, things got even worse. I wanted to date to feel accepted. Living with my parents, made me feel inferior because I've felt devalued and inadequate. I think my mother's hatred for my paternal relatives stems from jealousy and insecurity. She'd use manipulation to make me want to live with her and to behave. As a child, I feared the unknown, so I'd rather live with my parents than live at a foster home. Children need predictability for feel safe or at least more safe. Since, I want to be accepted and to belong so badly, I often have difficulty expressing myself. She has been using manipulation to obtain my love and silence me ever since I've lived with her (which is most of my life). I've grown tired of feeling inferior to other people. As a result, I became socially awkward due to feelings of inferiority. Feeling inferior, makes me lose motivation and concentration because I've never felt like I was "good enough" to do anything and that I'd almost always fail (if I succeed, I think it was just luck). Negative self talk only reinforces those feelings. I've struggled with negative self talk for almost all my life. Bad parenting has it's consequences on children's successes. I often distract myself to relieve my pain of feeling inferior to other people which only works for a short amount of time. Manipulation might give rewards in the short run, but has huge consequences later in life. I've sought out incorrect solutions to solve my problems because I couldn't identify the main cause until I self studied psychology and reflected despite the painful memories. I still have a long and tedious battle because knowing is only half the battle. If my problems had been resolved earlier, things would have been better for me, but it's better late than never. I believe that one of the most important aspects of parenting is understanding your child and why they're misbehaving...and empathize with them. Self esteem and self image is vital part of a person's life; therefore, creating a safe environment for children is crucial for their development if you want to raise healthy children (both mentally and physically). I wanted to run away from home as a teenager because of this. Luckily, I questioned my logic and didn't run away because I didn't want to live as a homeless teen.