I'm not moving from this spot. If this is the only control I have left, it's not moving. If I get up I lose control...I'll OD, I'll cut, I'll end up back in hospital or worse. I'm just not moving. I can't cope or deal with this, I'm at the point where going back to cutting would be considered an improvement on the ODs, on the hospital visits...

I'm just going to sit here in the dark and pull all my hair out because it's all I deserve, I never get anything right and I've just lost control.