Sometimes I realize that being sad will not solve anything and that I have to embrace the reality of life. I tell myself that living in the moment is all I've got and I actually feel like myself again but out of nowhere I get this intense fear and sadness I can't control. I've noticed that when I'm out at the store or something, I don't feel as depressed and anxious but when I'm at home, I feel completely miserable. I don't have anywhere to go and/or friends to hang out with so I'm stuck at home all day. I know I have the power to change my life but I don't know how. I have too many issues with myself to get an actual job and go back to school. Sometimes I wonder what it's like to be a normal human. I know no one's life is perfect and all humans have worries but I don't want to worry about things I can't control.

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