Hi Daisyonthefloor, I have never been diagnosed with BPD. I have been for depression and I knew before I had seen a doctor that I was depressed because of the way I was thinking. I was not happy about anything and addictive behavior that I knew was not right. It had gone on for to long and I just couldn't snap out of it. Going to see a doctor will be a good thing for you, I think they will be able to help. Don't give up, things can get better.