I got "there" (by your T's defination) and knew I was there but still didn't quite know where I was or how I got there :-) and, like everything else, the sense of "it" comes and goes. I don't always feel like I'm there but now I can at least find a core place, a "Me" who has a clue and can help me out. But I was confused the whole time I was looking for there too and afraid "Time" would run out before I found it, that I was moving forward too slowly. It's like tracking in the desert, for a long time I didn't realize I was tracking! Then I found the flow of the dry riverbed and gradually learned to follow it, etc.