Hi CE,

On the one hand, I think Madame T. was pretty tough on you when it comes to confronting you with attitudes and behaviors that she thinks are unhealthy and would like you to change. I would class her type of therapy as "tough love" therapy. I agree that sort of therapy might not be the right kind for you. It would not work for me either!

However, there's something about your reply that makes me uneasy. I'll try to put it in words if I can. . .

When I read your reply, here is how I interpret it:

Dear Madame T,

I found your reply very warm and encouraging. I felt really good about it, and it was just what I wanted. I know now that I would like a few termination sessions with you.

<Venerable T> says I need a different kind of therapist: one who will say "Yes" to my requests instead of "No." No offense, but you handled my therapy wrong. The only thing I can hope to get from you is a better ending and more understanding.

I don't want to take your advice to find out what my pattern is when it comes to relationships with strong women. I'm not ready yet. And working things out with you isn't possible.

Now that I've said what I need to, my next communication with you will be for a termination session.

Lots of love,
CE

Maybe I am taking it the wrong way, but your message feels passive agressive to me. You start out saying how much you liked her reply and that it made you feel really good! Then you tell her she handled your therapy wrong, and your other t agrees. You tell her you don't want to take her advice, that working things out with her is impossible, and that you will arrange for a termination session. Then you sign it "Lots of love." If I were the t, I would feel confused and wonder what the "message" is behind your actual message.

But I could be totally wrong. I hope you don't feel like I am finding fault because I relate to alot of your experiences in therapy and how you feel. I'm just saying how your message sounds to me.