Thanks for the replies. I did finally send her a text and just said "I promised to check in with you, but don't know what to say. I'm still struggling. I feel very resistant to sending you updates."

She replied back and thanked me for honoring her request even though I didn't really want to.

I know T asked this because I struggle with reaching out when I'm in crisis. Just, right now, it's more annoying than anything else!