I would offer that people who grow up, generation to generation pass on what they have live with and through. It doesn't matter what label, diagnosis I have put to it. Each generation passes learned, unlearned, and environmental traits, character, values on and on and on....
The 'whys' don't matter as much as what and how much we take care of ourselves and that means something relative to each person and family and members in the family.
It's taken me a very long time to have understanding and compassion for myself and then for others: conditioning seems to be a strong teacher.
I can relate to what you are saying about your Mother. I would say that therapy will lead you to do what is best for all concerned including your family and your Mother.
It is never as simple or finite....
regards
Jade
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