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Originally Posted by BlackSheep79
I've been going thru a bad time lately. I have bad thoughts and my pdoc knows and changed my meds today. Prior I had wondered when do you know when it's time to go inpatient? I have no suicidal plans just thoughts so things are a lot better than they were before, but I had wondered and never posted the question because I was afraid to talk about it. For some reason I feel shameful when these thoughts come into my head. I just sometimes get really tired of the ups and downs of the disease, as does everyone I am sure. I hope I don't get in trouble for asking this question but I was just wondering.
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Aww soooo understand. Yeah, I'm always having 'bad' thoughts. For me I just realized I won't ever not have them. At least the kinda thoughts I would imagine to be abnormal. I dunno. Like maybe for example, whenever I'm super physically close to someone and I having a conversation all I can picture in my head is having sex with them. It's not cool at all. I don't desire that. In fact it's torturous to fathom sometimes. This is just an example. There are many others. I am still learning. Don't be too crazy worried about having abstract thoughts and such..maybe be worried when you can't control reactions, and actions..when you start to fabricate reality..There is a point ,before the point of no return. You know when you can't hide it. If that makes sense...