My T is on holiday next week, and I was 20 minutes late to my last session. I always leave in plenty of time, but I waited 35 minutes for a bus (there should have been 3-4 in that time) and then got stuck in stationery traffic. I texted my T and he said we could start the session by phone or text if I wanted. I'd have liked to phone but the bus was crowded and my reception sucked so is was texting him and not getting his replies. Then I got stuck in a queue at the ATM and texted him to say so.

By the time I arrived at my session I was crying my heart out. 20 minutes of my session, gone. My T sat next to me on the floor, put his arms around me and hugged me. Then he said we could get back some of the lost time, we could go for 10 minutes extra so I'd only lose 10 minutes. After I left the session, I got some texts from him that hadn't arrived before, including one saying: "Leave it - pay next time," after I said about the ATM queue.

At the time I was so upset that I ruined my session. But now, looking back on it, I'm kind of glad I was late. I think this is the first time I've ever been upset and run crying to an adult (as it were) for comfort. I would not have expected that in childhood, would not have approached the adults in my life for comfort. Early on in our relationship, I was upset and my now-husband tried to hug me and I pushed him away.

It felt good to cry about something I had lost and to have that matter, to me shown that I mattered. That's not supposed to be a novelty I don't think, but it is to me. And it's easier to cry about something trivial than about the real losses.