Hi Breemarie, I have struggled with depression for most of my life—something like 25 years. I have had moments where I had hope and things seemed okay. I have also had dark periods where I just could not seem to get a grip on the depression. During those times, the worse thing I could hear was “just pull yourself together” or “just get over it” or anything like that. Those words just made me feel even worse about myself—like I was being depressed on purpose. That is absolutely not true. I believe depression is an illness just like diabetes or high blood pressure. We don’t blame the diabetic for have diabetes and we don’t blame the person who has a heart attack for doing it “on purpose.” Sometimes, even when we are taking our meds and we do want to get better, the depression keeps a grip on us. I have found that at times like that I need to try to make a change. Maybe a med adjustment, new types of talks with my T or a new T…I try to spend time reading about depression and various ways to better. I do a ton of journaling to try to sort out my feelings and thoughts. Of course, when I am depressed, it is hard to do any of those things—I really have to force myself. Take it slow and know you are not alone—there are many of us out here who have similar issues and feelings. Try to dig deep and find even just a glimmer of hope and build on it.