Lately I have had this terrible fear of being asked if I am okay. It's so frustrating. Sometimes my face just rests in a way that makes me look tense or worried. I don't want to talk about it. I feel scared of being asked to do things like hang out with friends because I don't want to leave my room but I also know I will lay around and cry about making myself feel left out. I know I choose to stay home and that is my decision. But I would be so much happier if I didn't have to face the fact that no matter what I decide to do, I'm miserable. I can enjoy maybe 30 minutes of each outing before feeling sad and removed from the situation and begin to crave being home alone. I realize I am doing it to myself. But what I don't understand is why nothing is making me happy and the things that used to make me happy make me sad. I hate listening to my favorite songs because they make me feel sad. I don't like being around people I love because the thought of being attached to them makes me sick. I can't go out and I can't stay in. I can't do anything. I don't want to do anything but sink so far into my bed I actually turn into memory foam.