Thanks lizzyjb. The bills do scare me so much, too. They didn't used to. I left them all to my husband to deal with and things seemed okay, so I didn't think a thing about them as long as nothing happened, but one time a few years or so ago we did get our electricity disconnected. He had fallen behind and it added up; and luckily my parents were able to help us out so it was only about 4 hours. We paid them, and they came back and hooked us back up. But that can't happen all the time. Money is tight for them, too. They're overloaded with helping out my sister and nephews and their own bills. I'm so terrified of electric being out - the uncertainty of how long it could be out and not knowing, that that bill is just hanging over my head something terrible. I worry about being homeless anymore, too. So afraid I couldn't make it on my own if I'm left with no one in my life. I know I'm thinking the worst and no one really knows. I could pass away before my husband. I just think of all of these scenarios of being left behind with no family left, and I have no friends to help me. I don't know what I'd do. What scares me is I may not have my family my whole life time; and it's just going to be me, and I don't know if I can survive alone.