sounds like you really need to talk about this to deal with your depression but it is not a topic that he is willing to discuss. you need somebody who is more neutral and able to discuss it with you. because it is a dream of yours, something that you need to grieve if you are going to stay in this relationship and that takes talking about it. but he is not able to deal with it, it is a hot button for him. so maybe a friend or a therapist is a better person to get all these feelings out to. you need to process them. it is important for your healing. find someone you can share them with. somebody who is willing to listen compassionately and nonjudgementally. take care.