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pinksoil said:
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almeda24fan said:
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pinksoil said:
I still hate this. I told him that I was stupid for ever staying in therapy in the first place. I told him that for our first couple of months, I tried to convince myself that I didn't like him. Anything so I wouldn't have to get attached.

I did tell him last session (jokingly) I wanted to hate him.

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Incidentally, I did the same thing to my husband. I saw early on that I could fall for him-- so I tried to convince myself that I hated him. In fact, when we first started dating, my friends would ask what I thought about him. I would say, "Well, he's kind of perfect for me and all.... but I hate him." Like I said-- anything to avoid getting attached. My terms. I told my T about this. About how I have never been broken up with or rejected by a guy before. It has always been on my terms, and my termination.

That's what I love about therapy. The discovery of patterns. However much they hurt... the patterns.

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Yes, the patterns I'm discovering about myself are quite interesting. I'm thinking you're right more and more about me. Maybe I'm the one who is uncomfortable and he is just mirroring me. When I get over this part so will he? Perhaps he will