I've been in a similar situation. My wife has the same issues you do. I keep wishing she would seek some sort of treatment. I keep giving her therapist information in the hopes she will make an appointment but never does. You at least are seeking help. I think a big reason for her depression and mood is that her mother lives with us and she is constantly driving us all up the wall. Of course this makes the home environment very toxic. I've already told her all she has to do is say the word and I'll ask her to move out but I guess since her mother doesn't have any options (only collects about $1100 on SSI) she feels too guilty about kicking her out. I think kicking her out would cancel out the need for a therapist. I just keep telling her that I'm sorry and that I am there for her. I'm hoping your husband does the same for you.