My son has had a variety of diagnoses over the years: bipolar II, psychosis NOS, paranoid schizophrenia, and chronic paranoid schizophrenia.

It's been a long, hard struggle, but currently he's stable. He's unable to work much, so he's on disability. He lives on his own in a house my sister owns, so she gives him a huge break on the rent.

After years of resisting mental health services, he's now working with a psychiatrist in private practice. He's on a very tiny dose of Zyprexa. His pdoc is weaning him off the medication to see if he can stay stable without it. Right now he's taking 3/8 of the lowest dose pill available. They've been lowering it by 1/8 each month. He's told me that he intends to stop at 1/4 of a pill and stay there. As the dose as gotten lower, he's starting to have trouble sleeping, so he's going to keep the last tiny bit to help him sleep.

Sleep is huge issue btw. Is your son having trouble with sleep?

My advice to you is to be skeptical of the mental health field. They're useful, but they're going to push meds as the only solution. Meds are only one tool that can help. Keep researching and talking to people about other things have can help.

Keep the lines of communication open with your son. My son and I had a terrible relationship when this started and through the early years. When things got really, really bad, he'd instinctively turn to me for help, but it was constant conflict. I only started making progress with him when I stopped trying to force medication and started investigating alternatives. Ironically, he's now on medication and has been for several years.

Really talking to a person in psychosis is an art not a science. And each one is different. You'll learn as you go. I always assume my son makes sense and has something he's trying to communicate, even if it sounds like nonsense at the moment. For my son some of his most frustrating moments come with being misunderstood or not listened to. That's the worst thing I can do-- let my mind wander when he's talking to me. And he can get really angry if I don't understand him - even if it's just because the phone is breaking up. I've had to work with him to calm himself when things like that happen. If I ask him to repeat himself, he gets angry. If I pretend I understood, then later in the conversation it becomes apparent I didn't, he gets angry. We're at a point where we can talk about these things openly, and I've told him that talking to him is like walking through a field full of landmines. I've learned more and more things that set him off, but he can still surprise me sometimes. And sometimes I relax my vigilance and put my foot in my mouth. Honestly the less I say, the better. Listening is really important. And demonstrating that I heard what he said and understood it. He seldom actually wants advice at this point.

You have a long journey ahead of you, I think. It sounds like you're on the right track, though. It's about respecting the other person. The mental health system often isn't respectful of people like my son. They tend to forget he's a person too.