Quote:
Originally Posted by HazelGirl
I guess I'm just looking for an explanation as to why I always feel so emotionally volatile and relationally inept. Why is it I am so afraid of people abandoning me ALL THE TIME? Why do I feel like people hate me if they do one little thing wrong? Why am I terrified of getting close to people? Why do I see nothing but how terrible I am when I think about myself, down to the fact that my very voice on a recording or picture in a frame are disgusting to me? These are such extreme reactions to such normal things, and it puzzles me.
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abandonment is at the top of bpd, i fear abandonment all the time, i think my t is sick of hearing it already, did you ever read the book, i hate you dont leave me. anyway, its so confusing because i dont want her to abandon me yet sometimes i hate her and i want to quit therapy, and sometimes i want her to tell me to f u c k off , then sometimes i want her to tell me I will never give you up, sometimes this happens in the same hour.