I am so sorry you have gone through so much. It can take a while to get stable again after an episode that you experienced. How often do you see your pdoc? Can he help you resove some of your present issues revovling around the bipolar disorder?

Once you become stabalized your abilities have not disappeared. Maybe your confidence has. Maybe you have gained some insight into how unforgiving this illness can be. I am sorry it was so devastating.

Please feel free to PM me anytime. Take care.