I had 2 main reasons why I sought an accurate diagnosis.

1. I was already labeled BPD w/o the diagnosis for 13 years. I had a break down in a board and care I lived at when I was ~19... one of the counselors stood over me yelling at me about how "BPD" I'm being, etc.

2. None of my symptoms fit the other conditions. I know I don't have bipolar, PTSD, Schizophrenia, or any other type of personality disorder. I felt like I was floating around the mental health field with no place to land. I knew my symptoms were real, but I kept worrying that maybe I was faking it, maybe I was simply being lazy.

I explained it to my doctors: it's like having a tumor, and your doctor knows the full diagnosis but doesn't want to tell you. But you go home worrying: what if it's cancer? What stage am I in? How much longer do I have left?

Yes, cancer vs BPD is a lot different. But for me, it wasn't about the label. For me, it was about understanding myself.

I'm very lucky. My Pdoc has had many clients with BPD. She also stays up to date on research in psychiatry. She knew that SSRI's are shown to have the greatest effect on BPD's depression symptoms. And that using a mood stabilizer helps reduce the extremes of reactivity.

My T has never had a long term BPD client (she does, however, have a ton of experience working with PTSD). She knew the stigma attached to BPD, but she didn't judge me for any of my mental health issues. She simply got to know me for who I am. She does admit to me that I'm challenging and can be frustrating, but that she also enjoys working with me and actually looks forward to our sessions.