Do you see where your borderline, gets in the way, right here, with this particular statement? If she contacted you, out of session, for several days in a row, after notifying you, then technically speaking, it wasn't without 'second thought'.

It does stink to be in your predicament. You are specifying a need and desire for therapy, and though this thread, you've had difficulty finding a treatment provider. That's not fair, to someone who is willing to seek treatment.

Just wanted to point out, where your illness, is getting in the way of this particular struggle.

Is she able to refer you to anyone, at all, who will take your insurance coverage? As a courtesy to you?