i dont know where to write this, but it kinda has to do with relationships so..

im 18.. and I've never been in a real relationship. My first question is: is that normal/typical?
I don't date EVER.. and i think more than anything, it's due to my low self esteem.
Every time i think of getting close to someone, i get uncomfortable..
I've turned people down. not because i don't like them, but because I am afraid..
i don't know how relationships are supposed to go.. i don't know how you're supposed to act around them.. i'm not afraid of social interactions but I am so self concious that i just avoid it.
Im afraid of letting someone know the real me.. i guess im scared of what they might think or what if they don't like me?
I'm not confident about my appearance either, so i just dont' know..
also, the whole intimacy thing freaks me out..
most of my friends have or have had sex with most of their boyfriends.. and i think it's probably whats expected out of a relationship.. i don't think i am ready for that..
i'm not that religious but i dont believe in having multiple partners..
so do guys/men accepta girl waiting for marriage?
i don't know if im waiting but I've been taught that it's NOT ok before marriage that I can't imagine going against my family's beliefs.. even though i dont follow my family's rules anyway.
I want a relationship.. and i am interested in a few people..

but is it better to not be in a relationship? and is it possible to have a relationship with a guy right now? i know that all teenage boys are interested in that one thing only..

so what to do...