I've read some of your postings and can DEFINITELY relate to what you're going through. Work can be tough, especially that many hours. I get up every morning, go though the motions, and am sure my cat is tired of me asking her to go in for me. Who knows what animals understand, but I know that I have NO IDEA what she's saying to me. There's no one at work I can trust, so I'm forced to keep my "gripes" to myself.

Working that many hours is also tough in finding friends or activities to do. When you're alone it seems people have got their own lives or their own problems to deal with, so it can be tough to find new friends/people to do things with. And it's tough forcing yourself to go out by yourself with no one to enjoy activities with.

It's also tough seeing others enjoying life (real people, tv, movies) when you're just going through the motions, often faking it, just to exist from day to day. We see others being happy, why can't we feel the same way?

I go to a depression support group but feel limited in what I can say; others there have got things worse than me. For example it doesn't feel "right" complaining about a job when others when others don't or can't work, but want to.

Sorry this reply doesn't give you much encouragement, but at least it's from someone who can relate to what you're experiencing. Feel free to send me a PM if you want to. The infamous "they" say misery loves company. Maybe our misery can help each other with ideas.