During an episode, my thoughts are never-ending and irrational. They spiral out of control, ranging from memories I've had from childhood to those that are recent. Within this thought process or crisis, if you will, I almost always ask myself the following question: "why me?" The depression becomes so heavy, so painful, and seemingly endless I must inquire why I have to struggle with this illness. It's very self-centered, indeed, but it's a question I'm sure all of us have asked when battling this terrible experience. Once I began thinking: "would you rather endure a physical ailment such as heart disease or would you rather deal with depression?" I haven't figured out what my final answer is but it's be interesting to hear what you guys have to say.... Which would you prefer?