You have a point Alexandra. I've often worried that if it all went away, somehow I'd be betraying myself - that I'd be unfaithful. I wonder sometimes if I'm afraid to be cured because it's the only thing I know and I don't know how it will change me or what I'll do without this pain I carry around.

I just read this in "A Shining Affliction" and I really liked it. “I am not and will never be entirely “cured” of my own suffering.” (pg. 295) Maybe that's a good thing and I'm grateful.

Still I feel that we can get better without being disrespectful to our suffering. That we can rise above it and get to the point where it is not in control. I even feel that if we are brave enough we can get to 'the other side of suffering.' It's an important thing, suffering - it is a method/instigator of growth. If we use it constructively we can recreate ourselves to become more functional instead of less. (That last is my affinity to Dabrowski talking.)