I can understand every bit of what you have written. I was in a relationship for three years. I was emotionally abused. This person was an ambitious egotistical , narcissistic, sociopath. He put me through great misery and lo and behold one day he just cut all ties with me...the irony being it was I who had every reason to end the relationship...
And though I should be glad it's over yet it hurts so much and even though the good moments were so few and far between I really think of them and miss them. It will take a while. I find that getting my mind on other things does help... Yes it does come back to me unexpectedly right in the midst of it all but I just hope it will go away after some time. The irony is that my ex has moved on and is doing pretty well for himself. I first felt pretty devastated by that news but today I try to use that as a weapon to move on better. It's been six months and I am still counting....