Hi,

My husband is 11 years my senior, smokes cigarettes and drinks large amounts of red wine. I got sober 1 1/2 years ago so I'm a new person. My husband told me when I started AA that I wouldn't last because this will be the same as my gym membership. I know this is unfair, but I see him as being weaker because he can't quit his addictions. In Al-anon they wouldn't ever say that because it's a disease, the person is sick and so forth.

The link to the wheel of abuse is below. I see all my husband's characteristics in many of these behaviors.

The Duluth Model - Domestic Abuse Intervention Programs - DAIP