I am so sorry that you are having these issues.

Maybe, one approach to helping solve your dilema with touching things that are "dirty" to you is to find something that you find "mildly" contaminated. Something that you feel uncomfortable touching, but it really doesnt get you worked up. Touch it, then resist the urge to wash afterwards. Work on this for awhile, and as the fear of those things fade, try moving up to some items of a higher contamination content. Then work on those. This would be the Exposure and Response Prevention method (im sure you have heard of it).

Your brain just needs time to be retrained, and you CAN do it, it just takes a little time and effort, but mostly, it takes commitment. You have to tell yourself "I AM going to beat this!". Eventually you will, and I believe you can.

As far as touching your tears, just remember, those tears come from inside you, and they are clean. Tears are simply a natural moisturizer that help lubricate your eyes. They are made from your body, and so they are a part of you, just as much as your hand, your hair, your skin. So touching your tears would be just like clasping your hands together, because it's all you.

Whenever you start to feel anxiety coming on, refocus your thoughts to what is really happening. Don't concentrate on what it is making you feel the anxiety, but rather, concentrate on the fact that the anxiety itself is just a problem in your brain manifesting itself physically, and is an irrational response.

You are NOT a burden. It is very hard for people who do not suffer with OCD to understand someone who does. My best advice would be to find him literature about the disease and have him read it. Provide documented cases that prove that OCD isnt just "something stupid in your head", but it is in fact a documented and vicious problem that can lead to alot of issues in the lives of people who have it.

Get him educated so he knows what you are going through, then he can better understand how to help you, and understand when things are bothering you.

One more important thing is to find something that you can do to relax. Something you can put yourself into and something to preoccupy your mind. It may be an activity you like doing, or could be as simple as going to a tranquil place in your mind to leave your problems behind. The one big drawback to having anxiety is that if you give into it, the anxiety will just feed on itself and spiral out of control. If you resist the urge to obsess over it, the anxiety will fade over time. Finding something that relaxes you will help you resist the urge to give in. Relaxing yourself will help you feel less stressed and will improve the way your mind works, and help you work through the problem.

Anyway, I really hope you get it under control. OCD is the animal, but YOU are the master!