Today, I broke down, the stressors around me and intense anxiety triggered a big trauma response because of an event I must do tomorrow.

I emailed my T, he couldn't see me. Later today he had a cancellation and emailed immediately, I missed it but we ended up talking.He really helped, he was kind and understanding and helped talk me through it and begin to be able to think almost sensibly again.

It has me stumped....his complete support and understanding, his concern and care actually is not what I am used to. And it makes me feel at the same time grateful and uncomfortable.

I wonder if it would be easier for me to deal with him being annoyed or angry and dismissive, and actually had the thought this would be better. How strange, and sad that I would find it easier to understand that sort of behavior rather than what he is showing me. What he is showing me is almost so alien I don't know what to do with it!

Has anyone else found this? How do you trust and believe in this and understand how to respond to it?

Sorry if this seems weird, or is it?