Try not to get too hung on these names; they're just words. You are obviously severely struggling in life, so rather than thinking "I'm crazy." think something less depressing and more rational: "I'm severely struggling in life, but I'm working on it." Personally, I refer to myself as crazy, nuts, whacko, insane, etc... doesn't bother me; they're just words, and I know I'm somewhat unhinged. But, I'm working on it. I take comfort in the fact that I'm not so far gone that I'm a disgusting person doing all sorts of horrendous crap, hurting people and what-not. I have to hope I'm still a good person, a human; a human who is struggling.

Take care.