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untold27 said:
Hello.
I feel idk..stupid? for posting a new thread about my situation, but I feel as though I need to get this out and ask for opinions, and you guys seem nice enough anyway.
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Welcome to the forums friend. Do not feel stupid, whatsoever. MILLIONS of people have issues with anxiety in many different forms. Probably some people you know even have these problems in some fashion or another. Getting it out in the open is the first step in the road to recovery.
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I worry about locking myself out of my dorm house. I did that once and stayed in the stairwell for five minutes until someone came out and I could go back and get my keys. In response to this, I check to make sure I have my keys on average, about five times before I leave the dorm. (Twice before I leave the room, once at the elevator, and a couple times as I walk through the lobby.)
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Sounds like you are "checking". In that I mean, you already know you have your keys, but your mind is tricking you into thinking that you need to recheck to be sure. This is very common with people who have OCD, such as myself.
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But since I have confronted the fact that I may have an anxiety problem, my anxiety has been getting worse. It is the only thing I can think about and I have lost much of my already draining concentration worrying about it, although I dont know what exactly why I am worried about having an anxiety problem..
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You are having anxiety about having anxiety. First, you need to know that OCD is a chemical problem in the brain, having to do with the way your brain processes information. Secondly, you need to know that with a little determination, you can lessen the feelings of anxiety or even remove them altogether. It just takes a little time to retrain your mind. I think that OCD actually becomes habitual. It seems to start out as an annoyance, and then graduates into a real problem. I have a feeling that this happens because you end up training your mind to keep doing repetitive behaviors. Now it's time to "unlearn what you have learned" [Yoda, from the Star Wars movies (TM) all rights reserved]
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even right now I am feeling tense...and.. frustrated....
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I know your pain, I also have the feelings of being tense and frustrated, especially when I cant get my mind to repeat things precisely, and I end up spiraling into a long block of "thought repetitions".
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I don't know. That is my story.. really long and possibly pointless. I dont know.
Feedback would be really appreciated.
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It's not pointless and certainly not stupid. One thing I would suggest is to read these forums, get into the chat rooms and talk to people. I have found that this whole website, the message boards and the chat rooms have had an effect on me. It is a place where i can come, be open about my problems, and talk about them without fear of people laughing at me, or thinking it's just some stupid silly little issue. Here, we all have our problems, and everyone understands what it can mean in our lives and how it can distract from our daily routine. Most of the time, I can come here, chat, read some posts, and write some posts, and when I am done, when I log off, I feel a little more at ease, a little more relaxed. This is because of the fact that I don't have to keep my problems bottled up any longer. I can be free to openly talk about them, and get advice from other people, and it feels very good to know that people understand. It's also because this is a place where I can admit that I have a problem, which is often the hardest thing to do.
Things I have written in my posts are things that I could never talk to my Dad or my real life friends about, but I feel that I have friends here who understand, and that is a great feeling.
Welcome to the forums friend. Post anytime, i'm sure you will have more than a few people willing to lend an ear, give some advice, or share stories of their own, just to let you know that you are not alone in this problem.