SkyWhite, I am challenged with that constantly myself. My husband tends to have very unsupportive responses to me and he can be very invalidating and I find that very hard too. I have discussed this with my therapist that has pointed out to me that he has noticed that my husband does tend to talk over me and trigger me because he suffers from compulsive ADHD.

I am so sorry about the woman at church that triggered you so much that you just stopped going. I have had to distance myself from experiencing that with my older sister who tends to be very condescending and dismissive and unsupportive towards me. It took me time to work on that and talk about it in therapy and make gains on the PTSD before I could even talk to my older sister on any level at all. I faced some shouting and dysfunctional behaviors in my home growing up too. I had figured out the roots to why that took place a very long time ago, however, when I developed PTSD I realized how that had affected me in ways I didn't realize. As you talk about your own history and get validated and a therapist helps you understand it better and finally process it in healthy ways, you will finally be able to handle dysfunctional people better and better when you experience them.

This is going to take time for you because right now you are only just starting and are in the first stage of your healing and learning to understand PTSD and how it is affecting "you" right now. I had such a hard time with that myself in the beginning because I did not understand "why" I was struggling so much at all. As you keep moving forward with understanding that part, you will make some important gains on it and be able to keep improving and you "will" begin to feel better.

A very important tool that you need to keep first and foremost in your mind. And this goes for you too Jane, and I also have to remind myself too. Is, as you are "working through and healing", when you experience a trigger or a challenge always remember "not" to self punish when that happens, you may not respond right or have the solutions to triggers right now, but that is only a "YET". You "feel" as though you are unable to work and be productive Skylight, but that too is only a "YET" and that may actually slowly begin to change as you continue to work through the PTSD and finally address some of your "deep challenges" that for some reason you just didn't have the right help with in the past to address correctly.

When you struggle with PTSD, it never means you are in any way unworthy or not smart enough either. You have been injured and traumatized and you are now hyper aware and confused and get triggered every time you are presented with something that is unexpected or confrontational that may have
hurt you in the past. What you need now is to identify these triggers, what they mean to you, and slowly develop healthier coping skills and ways of addressing them and also to be validated for these challenges. The answer to every trigger that tends to present the "fight and flight" response is always,
this hurts and I am going to learn more about it and if I get triggered all it means is that I have not resolved it "YET" but will with support, help, and patience and time.



OE