As you might have guessed by the title I am turning 40 today. I'm not real happy about it. I got up today with one thought on my mind, this is NOT how I pictured my life at 40. Out of work, hurt, and depressed. My job let me go a few weeks ago due to me not being able to preform the duties of the job anymore. I kind of always knew it was coming but it sucks nevertheless. Spent most of the night last night up with my wife, she suffers from awful cluster Migraines. No health insurance anymore I cant even take her to the doctor. I guess I'm just feeling sorry for myself. I know there are people out there in far worse shape than I am. I just feel like I can never keep my head above water for to long. Like I'm drowning. Just when I think its over, my head pops back up. I'm getting tired, sometimes I just want to quit trying. I love my wife and kids, I used to have so much pride in the fact that I was such a good provider. Now most of the time its a struggle to get out of bed in the morning. Feeling so lost anymore. My meds cost so freakin much. One that I take without the discount card that still good for one more time is 900 a mth. How do people without health insurance get buy. I tried to apply for Medicaid but, at 1400 a mth that my wife makes we make to much. Don't understand that. Anyway I guess I'm just venting. Thank you for letting me.