In my experience sideways hinting doesn't work that well. T will likely ask you directly what you mean, or possibly just ignore it until you are willing to be more direct yourself. I would just try to talk to her about how scared you are to tell her what you need.
 I know exactly what you mean by being frozen with fear.
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'...
At poor peace I sing
To you strangers (though song
Is a burning and crested act,
The fire of birds in
The world's turning wood,
For my sawn, splay sounds,)
...'
Dylan Thomas, Author's Prologue
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